Europe’s Whiter Shade of Pale.


The Europeans have spoken. And influences we thought we’d lost 70 years ago has resurfaced. Blue-collars, white-collars, intellectuals, poets, drunks, freaks and ignorants turned to the polls. Democracy at its finest. Room for everyone. How nice.

Apparently, some voters have forgotten about Europe’s grim history. Apparently, some voters have forgotten about the bloody mess racial divide have brought us in. Apparently, some voters have forgotten that at the time when countries were divided with solid borders—even brick walls—societies suffered, financially and culturally.

Europe has spoken, and the ignorants have surely won their influence. Congratulations.

9 extreme right-wing parties have gained seats in the parliament. Granted, they wouldn’t call themselves “extreme”. But would a fat person ever call himself fat?

Europe has a problem, apparently: immigration. Sure, when Ali’s kiosk is conveniently open, when everyone’s closed, there’s no problem; we love him and his kiosk. But when politicians and so-called experts discuss national identity, Ali and his dark “minions” are suddenly a problem.

Reality check: we’re all immigrants, either by heritage or current state. Immigration is ingrained in our collective history. It has set crucial movements in civilizations, just as fucking the neighbor’s wife has set crucial movements in the hotel industry.

We Europeans love to gloat and display our intellect with a glooming trip down the philosophical memory lane: the ancient Greeks, Sartre, Nietzsche, and so on. We love to showcase our free-spiritedness, our embodiment of all types of existence and lifestyles. And in many cases, it rings true in our everyday society. But Europe also has this fetich obsession with namely one thing: its Christian heritage. That particular heritage has a dark and bleak history.

For instance, the father of protestants, Martin Luther, detested Jews and made no effort to conceal it – actually, he went to blurb out his remarks, in 1543, in a neatly worded book called “On the Jews and Their Lies” – you can refer to it as a kind of “hate a Jew manual”.
Whilst reforming Christianity, he also set out a nice pillar of hate towards the Jewish immigrants and residents that would lay the foundation for German anti-semitism. That foundation would inspire a certain artist-turned-fascist in Austria.

Why do I mention this? And do I possess reservations towards protestants? Far from it.

I’m mentioning this because even though we live in peace time, history has a way of repeating itself. These extreme groups, who earlier existed underground, are now a part of the European political mainstream. They gain votes either because of a popular hostility towards certain religious groups or because of great dissatisfaction against their current leaders.

These extreme parties make a statement: that Europe is reserved for one homogenous group with matching DNA. Some say it openly, and some believe it with their heart and mind behind closed doors. They link adhering to a society with adapting to Christian, and in many countries, protestant values. Well, some of us are tired of this anthem. Some of us are tired of boy scouts that are in love with an idea that’s outdated and want to rob a society out of its many nuances.

Europe, your tolerance—and inclusion of fascists in your parliament—have just degraded you to a pitiful hole surrounded by beautiful, antique surroundings. You’ve just been out-shunned by one unexpected union: The United States. If a man with the surname of Obama would want to run for highest office in any European country, he wouldn’t stand a chance. The States do have its many shortcomings but in a political campaign racial talk, border lining to soft-core Nazism, means the end of your career. A thing that’s unheard of in Europe.

Well, all hope is not lost. In the end, money talks and bull-shit certainly walks. When the ignorant-border-obsessed-Christ-masturbating-puritans realize the economic repercussions of their decision making, they will not come to reason. But the people will; they’ll vote for themselves and their wallets in the end—not their neighbor.

Congratulations, Europe. We are all truly, truly blessed.